Desperate for my own dirt

I am desperate for my own dirt. I want a house on a little bit of land. Doesn't have to be much. But I'm sooooo tired of apartment living! Tai and I have been looking lately, but houses are hard to come by, and when you do come by them, they are awfully, awfully expensive around here. We're talking $200,000 or more. And that's for a piece of crap, generally. I think we'll ultimately have to settle for a townhouse, which really won't be toooooo bad, just so long as it comes with a fenced back yard.

I was just looking over our lease here. I didn't realize it says that:
1) Waterguns are not allowed.
2) The bouncing of balls is not permitted anywhere near the apartments - only in the tiny little playground.
3) Pet rent and a pet deposit is required even for caged animals. (WHY? What damage is my gerbil going to do to the apartment?!)
4) You are not allowed to make even the most minor repairs yourself. You must wait...and wait...and wait...for maintenance. And then they will charge you out the ass what would have cost you $.75 in spackle.
5) We must have the carpets PROFESSIONALLY cleaned when we move, even though they will replace the carpet before the next tenant moves in.
6) Strollers cannot be even STOPPED on the sidewalk, let alone parked anywhere besides the interior of our home.

Now is it just me, or do at least some of these seem ridiculous? It's not like we had a choice when we moved here. It was this place or nothing. But damn. Wish we'd read that a little closer before!